Mais Você

What would you think if I told you Matt Lauer has a new morning show host and he is a talking puppet named sir Lawrence who happens to be a Beaver. You probably wouldn't watch. Yet Mais Você a nationally broadcasted morning talk show that features a surgically plastic altered host named Ana Maria Braga and her lovable yet rambunctious sidekick Louro José who happens to be a talking parrot. This show is weird to me for other reasons as well. First off as I previously mentioned Senora Braga has had a lot of work done. I think she is a type of Android with an ass implant. (The ass implant part is true; the android theory is just my speculation). Secondly she eats and drinks on the show. Its not just a mug of water sitting with the guest as they chat about the current national scandal, which is unfortunately the death of a 5 Year old girl, the main suspects are her father and father's girlfriend. Anyways she's creepy.
But Brazilian TV is bad in other aspects. ) Globo is the largest network, which happens to be owned by a Jew. (Is there any media market we can’t infiltrate?) The network broadcasts dubbed American movies I’ve never seen or heard of, cartoons, the news and several novelas or what we would consider to be Brazilian Soap Operas throughout the day. 10 am is about an hour of cartoons spanning from Looney Toons to Mickey Mouse and even Bobby Esponja (Sponge Bob Squarepants) Novelas unlike our soap operas generally only last 6-12 months. Also novelas are the equivalent of prime-time TV only with considerably more shouting.
A novela is on 6 days per week. No repeats. I don't usually watch any, yet they are constantly on in my house, at the supermarket, gym etc. So they are kind of hard to miss.
Novelas are criticized for their unrealistic proportion of black Brazilians as characters. If there is a black character they generally tend to be a maid or the show takes place in colonial times and the character has something to do with slavery. I can't really follow the storylines without turning the volume up really loud. So as to not embarass myself I usually just pretend I know what’s going on. Plus who really wants to watch the dubbed version of Jumandi anyways?